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Asutosh
was the youngest amongst 3 children of a modestly religious family. Compared to
his two brothers who were bright in school, our protagonist was just about an
average boy.
Born
into this unpretentious middle class family with some strangely rigid sense of
values, Asutosh hardly ever received any special love or appreciation from the
parents, as for them, this was just not a done thing. Any innate talent
therefore had absolutely no chance of coming to the fore, as lubrication was never
available. This however had no specific effect on Asutosh who was a simple
happy-go-lucky kind of a boy.
To
be fair however, he had a (a) good talent for music, (b) he was almost always
extremely keen to help any and every one and with or without asking and (c) was
more than average in sports, but as was to be expected, these were neither seriously
noticed by the parents and because /in spite of the former, nor the other
friend’s circle.
He
was about ten, when he along with other friends of the locality was playing a
game which was very popular in those days- Kabaddi, an old game where one’s
capacity to hold breath and simultaneously outwit the opponents with physical
maneuvers are both tested.
The
game goes somewhat like this; there are two sides of say 5/6 members each. A
court is drawn, with a middle line dividing the two. Players from each side
take turns to cross this line, venture into the other territory, holding one’s
breath by loudly chanting “kabadi kabaddi” and at the same time try and touch
one of the opponents and return to base without getting captured by them. The
one who is thus touched gets eliminated, and so is the fellow who is unable to
reach back safely. The game goes on till one team loses all the players. There
is also a special feature; a fellow who is sitting outside gets automatically
re-instated when a player from the other side gets eliminated.
It
so happened that after a few rounds Asutosh was the only player remaining in
his side. His getting out would end the game. The senior players of his team
hopelessly looked to Asutosh to produce a miracle, get at least one of the opponents
“out” which would automatically re-instate of one of the team members, from where
there could be a hope for a revival.
It
was our hero’s turn to enter the opponent’s territory and come back neither getting
caught nor losing his breath. For the other team, with victory in sight, letting
the small boy Asutosh have a little satisfaction was a bit of a patronizing
goodwill. The boy scampered home with a slight grin, though the reality hit home
immediately thereafter. He now had to face the next test and save the day for
his team.
It
was now the turn of the opponents; the captain himself got ready for the final
kill; the crowd’s eyes however were on the little fellow. He had receded to the
extreme limits of the court, to allow himself some meager chance to secure his
opponent.
To cut
the story short, out of pure luck, our boy just produced the miracle; he pounced
on his opponent and pinned him down with almost no chance for an escape. The
entire act was as perfect as it was unexpected. The teams including the
opponents and even the Captain, who was caught, every one of them roared in a
terrific applause.
For
Asutosh this was an exhilarating moment; it was for the first time in his
humdrum life that he experienced something like a recognition/ and accolades to
top that. This moment however did not linger for long. It faded from memory
within the next few days. Life was back to the usual routine; going to school
without the home work getting done, having a thrill or two in not getting
caught for some pranks which were unparalleled in terms of “bliss” etc.
Around
this time a small family of a husband/wife team with their only daughter moved
to a house next to our hero’s. The daughter- Sangeetha- was about a couple of
years elder to Asutosh. She was not great looking, but the family doted on her
and felt that she was the most
beautiful girl in town. And quite contrary to the style of their new neighbors,
the parents would notice every little effort of the girl and proudly hail her
talents to any and every body.
In
sync with those times, Sangeetha was given music lessons at home; she was an
average student but to her parents her music was divine. At the very first
sight of this girl, Asutosh was smitten; he just liked everything about this
girl who appeared so different. The girl however was a bit haughty, could not really
care for this unpretentious young fellow, let alone like him. She felt herself
and her family too refined for this rustic boy.
As with
any new comer there were always little errands to complete, and Asutosh, who was
an innately noble “do-good-to-others” kind of a boy, doing such work for the
girl-who he liked- and her family was an indeed pleasant task. So much so that over
time the parents even started liking the little boy to the annoyance of the
girl.
Asutosh
was never seriously concerned about her feelings towards him; he was just happy
to be able to help. This however did not prevent him being constantly amused by
her limited grasp of music and the simultaneous “greatness chit” given by her
parents, but these, he kept to himself.
Time
passed by and our hero entered college; this was a wonderful experience for him
as there were neither the watchful eyes of his brothers nor the fear of
reprimands from the father. There was therefore this mad urgency to live life to
the full while it lasted.
This
dream was partially broken when he heard about Sangeetha’s marriage; though
there was nothing like nurturing of a thought of loving her, he was
uncomfortable to hear about her becoming someone else’s wife. The parents added
to the discomfiture – fully aware of his helpful nature- they gave him the huge
responsibility of looking after the groom’s family during the course of the
marriage; from receiving them to the time of bride’s leaving for her sasural.
Being
a nice chap, all his inhibitions were given a go-by, and he gave this job his
full hearted support and enthusiasm. Every whim of the groom’s party would find
a solution from our hero so much so that he became a darling of the groom’s
party- another pleasant experience- as winning such fulsome accolades, was a
rare experience.
By
the evening after the marriage there was a reception held by the groom’s party;
once it started, our hero decided to take a nap as he was absolutely sure that
everything that was to be done was done and feeling totally exhausted, he
needed to rest. Sangeetha’s memory was beginning to fade, and at peace with
himself he went into a deep slumber. As
the reception was coming to a close, there was this photo-op with all
family/close friends’ circle. Asutosh was never really missed though from the
groom’s side there were a few solicitous enquiries.
A few
days later, Sangeetha had come to her “maika” and there was this rejoicing all
over again. Asutosh was also there. When they were going thru the wedding album
in that usual “fulsomely happy” mood, Sangeetha’s mother genuinely was
surprised to find that our man Asutosh was not to be found in any of the
frames. To almost every one’s shock and to Asutosh in particular, Sangeetha
made the most obnoxious comment; that Asutosh had the uncanny habit of being
away from the scene when he was wanted.
Just
for a moment our very cool protagonist was taken aback; he was unable to
imagine that this girl, whom he had admired for so long, could be so uncouth and
callous. Never one to expect an
accolade, this stinging comment however was just repulsive. Civilized as he
was, he just let it pass and could only curse himself for having nursed such a
blind love for one who could only be described as rotten. He made up his mind
to be careful in the future about judging people.
Time
passed, he graduated, took up a job, but somehow the recognition/accolades
never really came his way; his boss would always cheat him by taking credit for
what he had done, friends -if not deliberately- out of habit did not take him
seriously ever. There
was however a silver lining to this; without being conscious of it, since he
could understand and emote with anyone who shared a similar fate; he was able
to come up with spontaneous praise for anything which was slightly better than
average, especially from those whom he knew. He could also spot innate talent
and go overboard at times with ecstatic comments. There was also a flip side-
any imagined slight, or sham behavior would rail him.
Once
it so happened that the son of a very senior person of the company had to be
given a birthday gift – a small parcel. The son was studying near the city
where Asustosh was posted. The man spoke to him personally to get this
arranged. Knowing this man’s warped sense of values, Asutosh was mulling over
as to what to do, when an opportunity presented itself to his pleasant surprise
immediately. A group company GM whose son was also there had instructions for
his sales representative thru Asutosh that this Rep’s next tour will cover this
place unofficially and Asutosh should not raise any queries with the bills.
Asutosh
thought his job was over; he promptly handed over this parcel to the Rep, and quite
forgot about this affair, after confirmation was received about safe delivery. However
after a few days when the senior man was in town, Adsutosh was indirectly
reprimanded for having used an office rep to do such personal errands!!!!!
Asutosh for the first time in his life was just disgusted; with his senior for
his hypocrisy, with that other GM who could use him so easily and yet be the
closest to the former and both of these cited by others in the company and
outside as examples of virtue/diligence et al, and finally the Providences
apparent unfairness in denying any kind of comfort which in His dispensation
just belonged to others and - worse- to especially those who probably did not
qualify.
He
was in turmoil when someone suggested that he visit a local spiritual guru; Asutosh
went to him without any great expectation. After hearing our hero’s woes the
Guru told him thus: “Your wailing about His raw deal is no better than the
successful one’s boast of his personal talent/endeavor. All your troubles can
be traced to your desire for ownership; this is mine, this gives me pleasure etc.
The moment you are able to get to the stage of “not mine” and in a true sense able
to feel that it is all His will and try and give away to all who are in more
need, you will start getting peace. The life we have been given is a sort of a
play script written by Him, and the name of the game is to realize that we are
all play-acting the role He has given us , the denial, the apparent injustice
et al will become meaningless once you reach this stage. This is extremely
difficult though but the only way to everlasting peace”.
Asutosh
came back with mixed feelings; being used to help others he could see no
problem with the first prescription, the second part “life is a drama” kind of
wisdom was a bit over his head. But the Guru’s voice, the ambience of his
ashram etc were soothing, and he could feel that stirring inside which seemed
to suggest that there is something in what the holy man had said.
The
next morning came two surprises; he read in the papers that Sangeetha has been
awarded a Padma Bhushan for Music! In her interview she had talked about her
diligent practice, her up-bringing and innate talent in music which could be brought
to fore by her teacher etc!!
The
other was a story from a friend in Facebook which went somewhat like this; a
man is attending to a complaint about electricity failure in a block in the
city and telling the caller that this will take a minimum3 / 4 days to get
attended to. The caller repeatedly calls up saying that the place becomes too
dark in the night causing huge amount of inconvenience to the people in the
area.
The
agency finally sends a man to the spot and who is able to identify the fault
and rectify it. He then comes to a shop to make a phone call to the boss to
tell him that the fault was minor and he has done the needful. He strikes a
conversation with the shopkeeper, who hearing that the fault is repaired thanks
this fellow profusely. The man tells him that but for that idiot who had phoned
up repeatedly this job would not have been done; only to find out that it was
the same shopkeeper who is that idiot. Then the punch line…
The
shopkeeper refuses to take the call charge of a rupee but our man insists and
drops a coin on the counter. The shopkeeper is unable to take it being totally
blind. When the man asks him as to why he should take so much of pain for a
street light problem, the blind man answers that being blind he could
understand what darkness meant!!!! Touche’ .
The Holy
man’s words starts to sink in ……. Asutosh renews his journey towards that final
peace in “realization”.
Hope folks you like it ...... Vichu
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